Erosion of Blame
by Lunthemerry
Summary: My name is Yuri Shibuya, and I've forgotten everything from the last two years of my life. All I know for sure is the undeniable pull I feel towards the tower... and the mysterious boy with the emerald green eyes. Wolfyuu; AU, psychological/ mystery/ romance, [REVISED].


Hi everyone, and welcome to my work.

The premise of this story is that Yuri discovers that he has been in a coma for a year after an accident and has lost much of his memories as a result; after he wakes up, everything about him feels wrong, and Yuri has to piece together what really happened to him. Thus begins the story that will incorporate elements of mystery, psychology, romance and tragedy. I've had this idea stuck in my head for a long time now, and I finally just had to write it down. Now, this fic is a **will become a M-rated work eventually** and will contain mature themes, so be forewarned.

With that in mind, if you're still here, please enjoy the story :)

_Italicized words are flashbacks/ memories_

'_Italicized words __**in single brackets**__ are thoughts'_

Prologue

The first thing I saw when I woke up was the ceiling built of wood and straw.

Someone beside me gasped. "He's awake!" Judging by the voice, it belonged to that of a young girl.

My head throbbed painfully as the world around me came into view. I was lying in a small room which looked like a wooden cabin, and there was a man, a woman, and a girl beside me. My entire body felt like it was coated in lead. It was difficult to move.

"Easy," The man said as I tried to strain my neck to get a better view. "You're malnourished, dehydrated, and you've been bedridden for over thirteen months. Don't strain yourself…give your body time to adjust."

"Wh-what?" I tried to speak. My tongue was dry and my throat was sore.

"Yuri?" The woman beside me spoke. She had a loose braid and strands of brunette hair that hung into her face. Faint wrinkles and stress lines stretched across her large, doey eyes. This woman beside me gave the impression of a lady who was once beautiful and vibrant, but withered due to worry and stress.

"Yuri?" The woman repeated again in a whisper. In my murky memories I tried to remember who that name belonged to. '_Yuri..?'_ That's... my name. My name is Yuri Shibuya. And this woman is...

"...mom?"

Miko Shibuya's eyes welled up with tears. "Oh Yuri, my b-baby! You're finally aw-awake-hic hic- my pr-hic-ayers have been answered-"

"Help me prop him up," the man on my other side said to the girl behind him, ignoring mother's outburst. The man wore a green overcoat, had a low black ponytail, and carried a serious countenance. He was well groomed, but for some reason looked even worse off than my mother. The girl behind him wore white from head to toe. The two of them helped me move into a sitting position and then the girl gave me some water.

"My name is Gwendal von Voltaire, and I am your physician. Could you answer my questions for me?" Gwendal requested. "What's the last thing you remember?"

"The last thing I remember is... that my name is Yuri Shibuya and I'm in… in my house," I said with realization. "I don't remember much else. My head hurts."

My mother gasped. "Oh Yuri...oh, no."

"I feared so," Gwendal said sullenly. "Thirteen months ago, you were involved in an accident where you were trampled by a horse and injured severely in the head." He took a deep sigh. "You've been in a coma until now."

My mouth fell open. '_What?'_

"It appears that you have lost much of your memory due to the trauma that you sustained, but due to the nature of your injury, I believe your memories will gradually come back to you. Now, I'm going to ask you some questions to make sure you have no significant long-term damage. What is the last thing you remember before you lost consciousness?"

"The last thing..." I wracked my foggy brain for memories. "I... I just started working as a garden boy for the Royal Palace..."

x

x

x

Selective amnesia was what I had. I remembered the street that my house is in, that my name is Yuri Shibuya, and that I was sixteen years old prior to my accident (technically I'm seventeen now, since I slept a whole year of my life away). I remember that when I grew up there was never enough food on the table because of a horrible famine that wasted the country before I was even born, and that I had to work as a gardener's assistant at the age of ten just to feed myself. I also remember that I live in a monarchy nation ruled by the royal Mazoku family, and that I had just left home to work as a low-ranking gardener in the royal palace, a privileged position for someone like me. The last thing I remember is my first day of work… two years ago. I had lost an entire year of my life in a coma, plus another years' worth of memories before that.

x

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"That young doctor is so brilliant." Mother said as she washed the dinner dishes in the sink. "You had just come home for the holidays, only to have that horrible accident. If that doctor had not been present and treated on you so soon, I fear we'd both be much worse off right now."

"He doesn't look that young." I said, poking at the peas on my plate. After two days, I was finally strong enough to get out of bed and move on my own. "If fact, he looked pretty old and tired."

"Ah, well. He's always tired...being the only doctor this town can afford, you know. The poor man is worked to the bone day and night. These days, you hardly ever see him unless you specifically call for him."

"I see…" I said, rotating the green peas around my fork. I hate green peas.

"Oh, I'm sorry," My mother suddenly dropped her dishes into the sink and rushed over to me. "Here, let me take this," She took my plate, all but empty except for the peas, away. "I forgot, you don't like green peas."

"I don't?"

"Don't you remember, Yuri? You've always hated green peas."

x

x

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The next day I decided to do something I used to be fond of, when I had spare time: taking a stroll down the street. Everything was just as I remembered... the streets filled with litter and run-down houses, the rusting milk stand across from my house, the shoe shop at the end of the street that always smelled like naugahyde, the open-door laundry rooms with workers scrubbing their arms raw in soapy water...and most of all, the royal palace, pristine and magnificent, that stood so distinguished at the top of the hill. Everything was just as I remembered, but I felt no nostalgia or familiarity with this place, the same way I felt like a stranger in my own house…and sometimes, even with my own mother.

Suddenly, a vision came to me as I stared at the castle.

_Deep in the palace walls, a lone figure, trapped in that tall tower surrounded by flowers, staring down at me… _

I was overwhelmed with an urge to get there. To travel to the castle…to go to the gardens…to see that person in the tower again.

By the end of the walk, my feet were sore and I was in a worse mood than before.

x

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"I want to resume my work in the royal palace."

My mother froze in her tracks and stared at me.

"A-are you sure? Whats the rush? You still haven't fully healed from your injuries..."

"Apart from my memory loss, the doctor said I was fine, didn't he? And besides, I know that I worked in the royal palace for a year. If I go to my old workplace, it'll stir up some of my forgotten memories, don't you think? Please mom, I want my memories back, and I feel—no, I _know_— that this will get them back for me." I desperately tried to convince my mother.

"But…you don't even know if they'll accept you back—" mother started.

"If I got in once, I can get in again, can't I? Please mom, I need to know what happened to me—"

"Nothing happened to you, honey! You just lived and worked in the castle, like you did at all your other jobs—"

"Then why do I feel so disconnected with everything that's supposed to be normal—that's supposed to be _me_?" I burst out. "I can't bring myself to care about the things I used to love. I'm not myself! Why do I feel so lost? Ha ha ha ha! Look at me, I'm complaining all the time—I never used to be so moody before! _What's wrong with me_?"

Mother just looked at me like I was a madman. She didn't speak a single word.

"Something happened to me during that one year that I worked at the castle. Something _changed_ me. Mom, please, I beg of you. If you know what happened to me, tell me."

"Like I said, Yuri," Miko Shibuya said, poker-faced. "you worked at the palace like you worked at any other job."

I smiled bitterly. "I'll be leaving in the morning. Goodbye."

_I need to know what happened to me_.

x

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x

The journey from my house to the palace was a three hour journey by train. I left home before the sun rose and arrived at the outer walls of the royal castle by dawn. Predictably, the gate was surrounded by guards. Hints of nervousness began to creep into my mind as I saw them, fully-clad in metallic armor and looking exceptionally dangerous. Meanwhile, all I had on me was a small amount of money that I had saved up from my previous jobs, my resume written on flimsy pulp paper, a semi-functional pocket knife, and the most presentable clothes I owned. I definitely could have thought this through better.

Still, I had to do this. Strengthening my resolve, I mentally reviewed my plan once again and walked up to the guards.

"Hi. My name is Yuri Shibuya and I am a representative of the Gardener's Association of the city of Tirania. May I request to have a word with the gar—"

"Yuri Shibuya," One of the guards suddenly announced through his face mask. "We have been expecting you."

'_Wait, what?'_

Minutes later, the castle door opened and I was greeted by a tall man with long light grey hair. The man was flamboyantly dressed in a long white coat and an even longer cape.

"Hi, Yuri Shibuya! My name is Gunter von Christ, and I'm in the senior decor overseer for the royal family. It's so good to finally meet you!"

'_What…' _I just stood there gawking at him.

"Well, aren't you going to come in?" The man named Gunter said.

"Well…I mean…that easy?" I sputtered.

"Ah, yes…from what I hear, you were involved in an accident and have amnesia as a result, yes? How tragic, how tragic… Well, let me inform you on the way in!" Gunter said as he began nudging me into the castle. "You were one of the royal family's best gardeners, Yuri Shibuya, a practical living legend among us! So skilled for one so young, we always used to say… Of course, we tried hiring new help after your accident rendered you incapable, but none of them were half as good as you. The royal family was incredibly disappointed with the state that their gardens were deteriorating to! So _of course_ we would welcome you back the _moment_ we found out you were well again." Gunter chattered excitedly.

"Oh…" I said, having difficulty comprehending all the information Gunter gave me. '_This might be a stupid question since he just introduced himself to me, but…_' "Mr. von Christ…did I know you? You know, before my accident." I asked.

"Unfortunately, no…the previous decor manager passed away right after your accident due to illness. Tragic, really. And please, call me Gunter!" Gunter said and winked.

The interior of the castle was grand and rich in appearance. Broad corridors lined with gold, red and violet velvet drapes…carpets made of fine silk…enormous sparkling chandeliers hanging on ceilings more than two stories high…every inch of the interior palace appeared polished and luxurious, a far cry from my hut of a house. But the servants who made everything look so presentable were oddly absent, and the emptiness of the castle grew more and more apparent as we walked further and further in.

"Oh, this is fantastic!" Gunter gushed. "First I'll show you the quarters where you'll be staying at, and then we'll get you in place as the senior gardening director right away—"

"Er… actually, I have something really important to say," I began. I've been dreading this part ever since I came up with the idea to go back to working in the royal gardens.

"Anything, Yuri, anything!"

"…I've forgotten everything about gardening."

x

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The blazing sun scorched my back as I trimmed away at the bushes in front of me. It was only yesterday that I left my house, trekked to the castle and met my boss, Gunter von Christ. I could still see the look on his face when I informed him of my uselessness.

"—_but I can learn! If you just assign me the very basic tasks first, I'm sure that my skills will slowly come back to me." I said hopefully._

"_Um…" Gunter stared at me, shocked. "Well, this is an unforeseen situation. Very."_

"_Please," I began, pleading. "I need this job. Didn't you say that I used to be the best? Can't you just give me a chance then?" I stared hard into his eyes, trying to make him see my desperation—daring him to deny me._

"_Well…I suppose we can start by giving you one of the easier gardens to manage…a small portion of it, anyway." Gunter finally said._

_Even though I planned this entire trip with success in mind, I still could not believe his words. "Thank you, mr. von Christ. Thank you so much!" I exclaimed with relief._

"_Oh, no need to thank me!" Gunter said, bashful at my praise. "And didn't I tell you before? Just call me Gunter!"_

Well, that went exceptionally well, but now I'm starting to doubt what I said. I was placed in a garden behind one of the four towers of the castle and was assigned one of the supposedly easier tasks: pulling out weeds from the flower bed. But, even after training from the head gardener, I still couldn't tell the difference between weeds and baby sprouts, and every time I did find a weed, it was challenging to pull out without damaging the nearby flowers. I have been working on the flower bed non-stop for over five hours, but my skills are as novice as when I started. Nothing's coming back to me. In frustration I slashed my finger on a rose thorn.

"Ow!" I quickly put my injured finger in my mouth, feeling the blood coagulate on my tongue. Sighing, I stood up and looked up at the tower stood in front of my garden.

'_This is what I'm here for_,' I thought. Ever since I saw this tower, I understood: all along, it was this tower that was calling me, pulling me in. Whatever is, or was, in this tower is connected to my lost memories…to the thing that changed me.

"YURI!"

My mind had a split second to register the voice that yelled my name and the flash of blurry yellow that passed before my eyes before I was tackled onto the ground.

Two arms wrapped around my neck, pulling me into a tight embrace. A pleasant, nostalgic fragrance drifted through my nose as the girl on top of me rose and pulled me up with her.

The girl in front of me had pretty brown eyes, short wavy hair, and wore a yellow sundress that complimented her tanned skin tone beautifully. The girl, who looked around her mid-teens, bounded on her feet in a lively manner as she regarded me with awe.

"Yuri, it's so good to see you again! It's been over a year since we saw each other last. How have you been? Are you doing ok?" The girl asked with concerned eyes. "The minute I heard you were working again, I ran straight over—Yuri?"

"I'm sorry miss, but I…I think I forgot who you are." I said regrettably. From the way that this girl was treating me, we must have been close.

"It's me, Greta! I used to visit you here and we used to hang out all the time?" The girl—Greta—said with a slightly concerned expression.

"I'm sorry miss, I was in an accident a year ago and…" I trailed off. For some reason I felt guilty for forgetting about her.

The girl's face fell slightly as she slowly comprehended my words.

"So it's true?" She said. "You've forgotten all of the time you've spent here."

I nodded in reply.

"Well, there's nothing wrong with that. You sustained such a serious injury, it's to be expected," Greta said with a gentle smile as she reached her hand out. "Let's start over: Hi, my name is Greta. What's your name?"

"My name is Yuri Shibuya," I said, grasping her hand for a shake. "It's nice to meet you, Greta. Er…again. And I'm sorry I forgot about you."

Greta laughed. "Aw, I understand. We were such good friends when you worked here, Yuri, that I'm sure we'll get along just fine this time. And wow, is it ever weird to hear you call me "miss"!"

x

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By the time Greta left, the sun had long set from the sky. I sat and absorbed everything that Greta has told me.

Greta was originally from the countryside, just like I was. However, her father, a high-ranking official, was called to take a permanent position in the castle two years ago, so Greta's entire family had to relocate inside the castle gates. Greta had just moved here when I first began working here, and she had trouble making friends with the royal upper-class kids in the castle. According to Greta, we met during one of her lonely strolls through the garden, instantly took a liking to one another, and have been good friends since. The fact that we were both country kids at heart probably helped immensely, she said.

'_I really like her'_ I thought. I believe Greta when she said that we were good friends, because for the first time since I regained consciousness, that constant nagging feeling of "I don't belong" vanished. Greta's presence gave me a feeling of nostalgia and home… much more so than my actual home and mother. How perplexing.

I stared at the vast garden as I mulled over my thoughts. The palace garden really is lovely at night. Fields of flowers basking under the gentle moonlight, fluttering in the breeze…it was breathtaking, ethereal.  
_"This used to be your favorite spot," Greta said. "That's how I knew to come here today; you used to always hang around this section of the garden."_

Why do I have such an attachment to this place? Subconsciously my eyes wandered to the tower in front of the garden. Suddenly, as my eyes reached the high window of the tower, my memories flooded back to me and I saw it—

_-he looked over to the tower and there, in the window, was a lone figure staring back at him. Ivory skin glowed under the moonlight, golden-blond hair ruffled in the breeze, and curious green eyes regarded him with unabashed scrutiny._

_It was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen._

_x_

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For those of you who have noticed, this story has been revised. The basic plot has not changed, but I have added/ changed descriptions and tweaked wordings here and there, just because I re-read this story recently and was aghast at how terrible my writing used to be. I hope my writing now serves this story a little more justice.

Please review and let me know what you think :) Chapter two will be coming shortly.


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